Some people are rocks. They're there for everyone, they're reliable and always available. Even if a rock is busy they will take some time or make some space because that is just what rocks do. But the Cardinal Rule about rocks is to never take for granted the ground you're on because that is all you have. No one wants a rock to lean back. No one wants to hear that a rock is tired, or lonely or would like to not be a rock for just a little bit. I broke that rule and leaned a bit and even let myself enjoy it, which was a mistake because now there's nothing to lean on except my own ground which isn't terribly secure at the moment. It will shore up, I just regret letting myself enjoy the lean because I know it's not going to happen again.
Anyway, classes start today and I haven't been able to sleep. So I'll try to do that. I gave up too much for this to fuck it all up now. When you're a rock there's no point in complaining that you don't want to be a rock anymore, it's just the way things are.
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